So you think all you need to get your Hygge on is some candles? You think you can walk into Søstrene Grene, raise your eyebrow to a poster that has an ice cream and says “life is Sweet”, and that was that? Hygge by default?
If it doesn’t make you smile, it might not carry the Hygge vibe. If what you do with the poster is stare and wonder if it is cheap enough, you are not asking yourself the right question. Hygge, my friends, is this simple:
Hygge is something you do:
Hygge is… (think of someone). Now, let’s call that someone –you.
Opening the door to find you.
Finding you on my way. So casual.
Texting you with lots of hearts and happy faces. And our own personal unicorn. Your signature emoticon.
Jumping to the sound of the reply text. Saving that text, and looking at it again. And again.
Saving a voice mail that you sent me? Even better. Creepy? No. Hyggeligt. (Let’s start from the fact that in all of these moments, there is fearless unreserved love- the kind that feels no shame at all). And love that is true can never be creepy.
Watching the moon with you.
A picnic and some wine with you.
One dessert, two spoons.
Having no words interrupt the conversations of our silence. Smiling.
Going on walks with you.
Stopping by a tree with you. Finding the ones that touch, that hug, and saying: check out that tree!
Toasting on orange juice with you. Sante, cheers, salud! (or coffee, or hot chocolate, or tea, or anything really).
So you are thinking: wait! But this is not hygge. This is love! Well, it could be love. It is probably love. But it is not always romantic love. It could be friend love, or stranger love. And if it happens in the context of romantic love..let’s say hygge would be the air in between both of you, the depth and ground of the moment.
Sometimes alone, “you” are you. Hygge is something you feel when:
You go to a concert and you hear that song. The music that you have listened in your ipod is now happening live and touching your skin. And the singer can see you.
You go to a birthday party and it feels like a hug the moment you arrive.
You go on a walk (or for a run) and think dreams. You stop by your own favourite tree and realise it has grown. You feel time. And presence.
You say goodbye to that person from the bus window (sometimes in your mind because your hand is physically stuck).
Saying goodbye to someone you love. You can’t move, you can’t breathe. (You wonder how long will that feeling last).
And some little things can be frames to hygge. Hygge is something that can happen when:
You drink a juice with a straw.
You get the last bit of the juice when nobody is looking.
You open the front cover of a brand new journal and smell the freshness of that paper, never touched before.
You open new marker and feels its drive, its power.
You crack the frosting of your dessert with a spoon. Anticipation.
You open the fridge and find the ice cream you forgot you had. You pick it up and holding its coldness in your hands.
You read your favourite book for the third time.
You find and old note on that book that takes you exactly to where you want to be- in your mind.
You move your eyes away from the phone to look outside the train window. Boom. Life. Or a sunset. You think: wow!
You discover the best possible sky.
You share an eyebrow “Hi” with someone random.
You have a moment with the dog waiting outside the grocery store. He is not free but he is free, because that is where he wants to be.
You jump on the bike and go downhill.
You sing while you bike home.
You hear the perfect song at the perfect moment. It feels like you have scored a point on the soundtrack of your life.
You get home after a long day, and touch the keys inside your bag on the first go.
You come back home to your son (insert loved one here- the “you”), like it is your first date, always your first date. You feel that urge to open the door, to breathe out.
You are so tired you can’t sleep and wake up to get the best idea. You write it down.
You stop to realise the blue light in your living room comes from the moon.
Hygge can also be found in all the moments you wonder, miss someone, or something, and dream vividly about those moments. You feel surrounded by the love in your heart that remains from past experiences, still so present. Hygge is that “something” you miss that makes you happy. You miss it but you are standing stronger, still smiling. Hygge can happen when:
You know that person is just a phone call away.
You smell your grandma’s perfume on a gorgeous lady that just happened to smile at you.
You watch your grandma’s old glasses on the shelf. You smile at the thought of old things that are always new. Nostalgia. You think: how great it is that scents are amazingly physical and grounded to this world, and in that way, eternal. Those glasses still smell like her, 15 years later.
You are grateful for all truth and beauty that remains, a shinning eternity on all its edges, memories.
You look at the moon, thinking that “someone” is looking at it too at that exact moment. You throw an imaginary ping pong to the moon and the ball reaches that other person. You think: you can keep it.
Let’s add to this list. Let me know what is hygge to you.